Are you feeling overwhelmed?
Stressed? Worried? Anxious?
There are certain times in your life when you can feel such overwhelm that it seems impossible to quieten your thoughts for long enough to be able to see a way through.
This FREE workbook will help you identify what is within your control so that you can let go of what is not.
It’s hard to set aside time to sit still when you’re spinning in overwhelm. Just give yourself 20 minutes to complete this exercise to help you take back control.
It’s short and simple but very effective. It will help you identify what is within your control so that you can let go of what is not.
STEP 1: WHAT’S ON MY MIND?
Calmly consider a list of all the things that are contributing to your worries and feelings of overwhelm.
It could be worrying about running out of food, worry about someone you care about, what’s going to happen, the dentist appointment you cancelled but can’t reschedule yet, homeschooling, feeling tired, work issues, lack of work, financial worries, feelings of guilt etc.
ACTION: Take the time to write EVERYTHING down no matter how small, irrational or ridiculous it might seem right now. Emptying this list onto paper is a very effective way of clearing that incessant chatter in your head.
These are your WORRY ITEMS.
STEP 2: EXERCISE
In your workbook, on the Circle of Influence image (page 6) you’ll see a larger version of the 3 circles or sections pictured below.
CONTROL, INFLUENCE OR CONCERN
One by one assess each WORRY ITEM and decide if:
– It is within my control (CONTROL)
– I can influence (INFLUENCE)
– Everything else (CONCERN)
ACTION: Next, work through the list of WORRY ITEMS you prepared in STEP 1.
1. Circle of Control:
Do you have complete CONTROL over the worry item?
Can you resolve it on their own without needing anyone else’s help or input?
If so, write the Worry Item down within the first circle labelled “WITHIN MY CONTROL” and move onto the next item.
2. Circle of Influence:
Do you have PARTIAL control or can you INFLUENCE the outcome of the worry item?
Can you partly resolve the worry item or can you influence the outcome through their actions or behaviour?
If so, write this item within the second circle labelled “I CAN INFLUENCE” and move onto the next worry on your list.
3. Circle of Concern: Everything else…
Is the worry item COMPLETELY OUTSIDE of your CONTROL INFLUENCE?
Is there nothing you can do or say that could directly impact this worry?
Write this item in the outside circle labelled EVERYTHING ELSE
Write each of your WORRY ITEMS in the circle that represents if you can CONTROL it, INFLUENCE it or it’s everything else (CONCERN).
S T E P 3 : T A K I N G C O N T R O L
Once you’ve placed all of your ‘Worry Items’ in the circles, take a few moments to review your Circles of Influence.
ACTION: List the worry items you DO have CONTROL over and IDENTIFY an ACTION,however small, for each item.
TIP: It’s helpful to action ONE of these today…or even RIGHT NOW, to help you instantly feel better.
Now, let’s review the items you have INFLUENCE / PARTIAL control over:
ACTION: Write down what steps you will take and exactly when you will do them – today or in the next few days.
STEP 5: LETTING GO
Finally…and most importantly…
QUESTION: How does it FEEL to LET GO of things you have no CONTROL over?
TIP: After striking out the Everything Else items, you could cut out around the edge of the grey INFLUENCE circle. Then keeping the CONTROL and INFLUENCE circles, scrunch or tear up the rest of the page and put Everything Else in the bin. This is a powerful way to LET GO.